Sunday, June 28, 2009

Overview: June 10 thru June 24, 2009

My original diary/message entries have been lost, due to someone sabotaging my computer. Personally, I believe the ability for everyone/anyone to just show up in my apartment whenever they feel like it enticed someone to corrupt my computer…as well as to drink most of my latte’s. I am delighted & amused by the fact they I have yet to purchase a toilet, though they probably just peed in my pools or plants instead…

At any rate, the facts remain, the issues remain: the government is not furnishing those of us in the Witness Protection Program with proper security. They have allowed all sorts of riff-raff into Alton Towers, and tolerate untold numbers to mill about outside the premises (See Photo). At some point, one of us is going to be ‘offed’ due to this blatant lack of safety precautions.

I have taken it upon myself to acquire additional protection from outside sources. Naturally, hiring U.S. Mafioso was out of the question, as most of us are here due to having testified against them. I determined to go to Cuba to seek help. Though I am/was aware that the Cuban Mafioso has U.S. connections, a one Mr. Diego Alvarez was reportedly the leader of an independent ‘family’. I proceeded to make arrangements to fly to Cuba to meet with him, and was able to find a reliable source for the large amounts of valium I required in order to get on a small aircraft filled with sweaty, scowling, non-english speaking men. The trip itself remains quite hazy, though I do recall missing the last step getting off the plane and landing on hands and knees, my skirt flying up over my back and exposing my fine white yo@ss to the entire aircraft crew. I will say, they are all much friendlier towards me now, if not outright flirtatious.

I was shortly directed into the awaiting silver limousine sent by Mr. Alvarez, which whisked me away to a lovely hotel owned by him. After attending to my skinned hands and knees, I was able to rest for several hours before meeting with him...

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